it's not so much that the past keeps intruding, really. it is that there is this door and i keep opening it, i am the one who keeps intruding. because i just can't help it.
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was talking with friends ruby and easy last night about the big three-oh. and how it does things to you. to your heart, mainly. softens you up, somewhat? creates new fears and anxieties, maybe? i think at some point we three agreed that in the end it is all good and exciting, really. 'cept that mine, when it happened, just came and went. am all the better for it, i guess. a much bigger thing extending beyond myself happened. no, actually signalled the end of a life, of the world, of things ever happening. in a manner of speaking. in many manners of speaking. so, i never actually turned. 30 just came by and left in a huff.
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